That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
