i just had sex bonerless
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize