return my video game
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
The feeling are messing with the penis
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize