Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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