How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I think im going to throw up on grandma
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
