We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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