We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Randomize