Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize