Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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