At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Randomize
