I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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