He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
