hotel room ftw
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
