the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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