apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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