I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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