"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
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