he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
