i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
