I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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