CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
