It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
