this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
And my parents said I crawled through the house
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
