My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
