That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I just gargled with NyQuil
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize