This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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