So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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