oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
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I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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