called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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