yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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