Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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