week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
My penis needs a shock collar
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
there is glitter all over my balls
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
