She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
