If i come over, it means nothing
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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