They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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