I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
