If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
