i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
