Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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