I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize