after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
