Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess

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(519): View more from Ontario

While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.

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(410): View more from Maryland

Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.

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(248): View more from Michigan

my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'

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(574): View more from Indiana

all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?

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(772): View more from Florida

No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand

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(703): View more from Virginia

He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box

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(308): View more from Nebraska

The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.

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(239): View more from Florida

I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.

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