did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
