i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
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