It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
