I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
