I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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