"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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