there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
