you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
